Special Good Luck Morning Price

When budgeting for a trip to the Orient, it is crucial that you do a honest and brutal personal assessment of your skill level in the chess game that is The Haggle.
It is not unrealistic to say that your precious travel allowance could last twice or half as long depending on your bargaining temperament. Travel guides are quick to bleat about how uncool it is to barter over what amounts to a few cents, but the truth is, without steely resolve and a suitably aghast expression when you're presented with the initial price, there can only follow a financial massacre, leaving only, blood soaked sarongs, an empty wallet and a bag full of cheaply varnished "antique" art, to be handed on to new travel friends as a gesture of "what a great connection", before b-lining it to the airport.

And be aware, it doesn't stop when you leave the tepid, sticky bubble that is the local market. It continues everywhere. Negotiating (and its dark twin sister, BeingRippedOff) are as ubiquitous in this culture as courtesy and helpfulness.
Everything requires a haggle: Accomodation. Price of the lunch buffet.

Even the morning paper from street corner newspaper guy. There in the top corner of the broadsheet, a delicately scratched out price has been replaced with a far fairer recommendation - 90,000 rupees (about 80 South African Rand). And we're not even talking chunky newspaper with Tonight section and stuff. No, just a flimsy 6 pager....80 bucks.
"It's a newspaper for christs sake, you insolent bastard."(This suitably aggrieved opening salvo marks you as no apologetic haggle first timer)
"okay, okay. I give you special discount.... 80,000" The price delivered with a hand flourish to bring attention to the headline, as if to suggest that the choice of Times New Roman in the masthead clearly marks THIS paper out to above your average fish n chips packaging.
"You make me want to throw up my undercooked banana pancake, you bottom feeding cur.(Here, the use of confusing high brow English allows for satisfying cussing without fear of being understood whatsoever ) I'll give you 3,000"
"Bank-roooooot!" (This standard guilt-laden response is accompanied by an anguished expression intended to invoke nightmarish imagery of starvation, pestilence and general hardship, which though most likely true, is damn unfair business practice )
"It's a N E W S P A P E R! Do i look like i've just picked my brain out of my ear with a blunt fish knife. How white do I look??! I've got a tan and everything...4,000"
"Okay okay...Final Special Good Luck Morning Price....60,000"
"Not only do I find that screamingly offensive, but this whole exercise is growing profoundly tedious. 5,000... (As none of this English will be understood, it is best at this point, to actually replace outstretched paper with 5000 rupee note and start backing away....
"No,no okay okay.... 10,000...9,000....8,000....6,000"
Wow really? You're so relieved at having dropped the price from 90,000 that you gratefully shove another 1,000 rupes into his hand and proudly stride away with a newspaper worth about 3,000.

And that's how they get you...everytime.